Rural Life in Berkshire

It's OK I haven't moved but I have let the two legs do a blog today about when Max and Sebastian and the two legs lived in another world - a place called Berkshire. You will see that in those days the two legs used to smoke - they don't now. Here's old two legs


This is a story first told back in the 2000s when Max and Sebastian were sprightly youngsters

For some time now the grounds of Chez Cook have become the feeding ground of Mr Nutkin and his family. It was while I was sitting out surveying the setting sun one evening that Mr Nutkin first came into my life. He bounded over the fence, mounted the bird table and began to consume an unimaginable quantity of nuts. I marvelled at his courage and his foraging instincts and began a conversation with him. He never responded as I don't speak squirrel and he doesn't (at least to my knowledge) speak English. Over the weeks he became more friendly until I finally coaxed him to take a nut from my hand. We had bonded.

This all changed when Max awoke from his 23 hour slumber a tad early one evening and came to join me for the relaxation hour. He was sitting on the bench beside me playing his imaginary cello when Mr Nutkin arrived. He bounded down the fence, up to the bird table, checked the nut scene and promptly made for the bench where he knew a secondary supply would await him.

Max was peeved at this intruder and jumped down to intercept him and chased him to the fence. Mr Nutkin turned and faced him. Max faced Mr Nutkin and for a moment I thought hostilities would break out. No. Max sat down and Mr Nutkin twitched his tail and hopped back past Max, up to the bird table and began to consume the nuts he had left. Max washed his face and came back to enjoy the remainder of the setting sun.

Now last night I was enjoying a pleasant smoke when Sebastian deigned to join me. For Sebastian the long trek from the lounge to the garden is a mammoth undertaking and a venture like that cannot go unnoticed. I was in deep conversation with Sebastian congratulating him on his agility and dexterity when we both noticed a movement to the right of the delphiniums. In awe we watched as a tiny face appeared and in the dusk we made out the outline of a large tailless rat moving towards us. I asked Sebastian whether he would dispose of the unwelcome guest but his non-committal response indicated his unwillingness to move for a second time that evening.

The creature approached us sniffing the air and I recognised Mrs Tiggywinkle. I appraised Sebastian of our guest and advised him not to attack as her defences were quite strong. I need not have bothered with the warning. Sebastian was tapping my leg asking to be raised off the ground away from this potentially lethal visitor. I picked up the 18lb of quivering cat and we both watched as Mrs T circled us and then went about her business of rooting through the flower beds.

The bliss of rural Reading on a summer's evening


Hope you liked that; he likes to write every so often and I feel a duty to let him use the machine. I'll be back for proper blogging tomorrow