Now life is getting a bit complicated. You see this two legs that knows my personal shopper lives ion the other side of the world in a place called Australia. Now Max tells me that because that is directly underneath us the two legs down there walk upside down. Anyway this two legs has said she is coming to stay for Christmas because she wants to see it snow - they don't have snow down there. Well max said if they did the snow would probably fall upwards and get stuck up their noses.
Well old two legs decided he would go out and build a snowman ready for when this upside down two legs arrives. He actually did a good job and I heard him shout out to my personal shopper
"Have you got a carrot for his nose?"
I wondered why he needed a carrot for the snowman's nose and I thought he must have stuck his finger up it when he was building it and given the snowman a nose bleed and now he wanted to stick a carrot up it to stop it bleeding. The carrot was duly passed out the window and I saw old two legs ram it up the snowman's nostril. I bet that hurt.
Two legs admired his work and commented to the personal shopper that the upside downer would appreciate that when she flew in and that it would make her feel all festive. These upside downers seem pretty clever if they can fly. My two legs here can't fly.
Well I got to talking about it all to Sebastian and he said it was not a good thing to shove a carrot up your nose. he said it could stop you breathing and you could die.
I went outside to see how the snowman was doing and he still had the carrot rammed up his nose and he wasn't moving or saying a word. I remembered Sebastian's cautionary tale and decided to act fast. I jumped up onto the snowman's shoulder and pawed the carrot out of his nose. Tragedy! His shoulder disintegrated and his head fell off. I killed him and the carrot didn't.
I am keeping out of the way until the investigation has completed
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