I was up early again this morning - had my usual fight with male two legs in bed, but then he decided he was getting up and let me out in the garden just as dawn was rising.
There was Percy as usual - you remember I told you about him before - wandering around the grass pecking away. I trotted up to him - ever mindful of what he did to me last time.
"Morning Mr Percy, what you doing?"
"Just walking around here catching worms. When I walk they think it's raining and pop up to avoid drowning and there's my next meal!"
"Wow, that's clever. What do they taste like?"
"Nice and meaty and juicy little fellow. Now when I was in Italy even the big two legs ate them. Mind they put all sorts of muck on them and hand them on plates and used forks and stuff. Not for me except for when they had the chicken in them"
"Chicken! Isn't that sort of cannibalism. I mean you're a bird and so are they aren't they?"
"Life's life matey. After all you eat that kitten food don't you?"
"Yes but............"
"Well what do you think's in that? They come round at night, collect up all the kittens and make them into your food. Isn't that the same?"
"Oh gosh I never knew. But......"
"Can't stop yabbering with you all day. Need to go and see about some baby food!"
Percy went to take off and remembering last time I dived for the lavender bush. Wow was I lucky - a big splat and he scored a direct hit on the washing line as he soared skyward.
I don't go out after dark now.
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